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The
sounds of birds, talbuks, and lashers wandering around the eco-dome in
Netherstorm were not enough to clear his mind of the latest torment that kept
striking at him. One would think that he had it all now that he was alive and
with someone who adored his company, but Cristianno didn’t feel at peace. Not
yet. He wanted one person to forgive him for what he had done, and as he sat by
the small lake, with the large shark tooth in his hand, he couldn’t get her
image out of his mind. He knew that she would never forgive him.
I
would have waited for you…
Her
words rang true. He believed them very much, but she wasn’t there when he
needed her. She had explained herself; she had been injured. However, he had
been injured as well. Cristianno laughed silently. No, that wasn’t an excuse
and he knew it.
The
next question that entered his mind was why had he started thinking about her
again? He longed to meet with her once more, without the tension that had
surrounded them the last time, but that too was impossible. He knew she was not
going to give in and simply talk to him. This very thought burned him from
within with frustration. He just wanted to be forgiven.
He
just wanted to be forgiven.
He
couldn’t wait for her. He couldn’t resist the temptation of a beautiful woman
being with him at any moment when she was so far away. Of course, she wasn’t
the first woman he had betrayed. The shark tooth in his hand reminded him of
the cruelest punishment he had for cheating: beheading.
Kahlen
and her father, together, plotted his death. This he understood, but was it
really that necessary? To die because he had cheated? Cristianno looked up at
the dome’s faint light overhead. No, he didn’t. Rain tried to kill him, but he
didn’t cheat on her. In fact, she cheated on him. And for a moment, Cristianno
worried that Niela would attack as well, but deep inside, he felt she wouldn’t.
He
did love her. He loved her for who she was. He hated that she thought more of
herself as an assassin than a woman. He tried very hard to remind her that she
was just a woman, not an assassin, not some criminal lackey, but a woman he
could please.
And
now she was gone and he only wanted one final thing from her: forgiveness.
It
wasn’t so simple to move on. Yes, he was happy and Alaia was turning out to be
the best thing that has ever happened to him, but he knew there was no closure
to his previous life.
Cristianno’s
mind swirled with all these thoughts as he continued to look at the shark tooth
in his hand. He wrapped his fingers around it and closed his eyes, sighing
deeply, and recalling the words he had sent Niela. Perhaps she wouldn’t
respond, but it was worth the try. At least, for that moment, it seemed to be.
(Addressed to Davina,)
Dear Niela,
Please
forgive me.
-C-
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